It’s not about me…

Do you ever find yourself not enjoying a lesson that God is giving you?

In the midst of a lesson, I find that it always seems to reveal some lack of character that I struggle with.

Topic at hand:  selfishness.

But I can’t possibly be selfish! 

I do everything for everyone else.
I am kind.
I care for others.
I have good intentions. 

and yet, God simply hears blah, blah, blah…
for what he is working towards is a matter of the heart.

Here’s a lesson at hand:

A table.  A dining room table.  simple?  you have no idea.

A borrowed folding table. 
Big enough to sit 6 comfortably; we squeeze in 9.

I found a good deal on a beautiful mission-style table that seats 10! 
I thought I found the treasure of the century.  *smile*
I justified the cost as a “20 year anniversary” gift. 
Why, shouldn’t a mama of many have the right tools to provide a meal properly?
I’ve been patient, right?  20 years, 6 children, and now a mother-in-law to join us.
Score!  right?  wrong!
Dear husband didn’t not see a treasure in this purchase.
He has other plans on how to spend the money he works hard for;
really?  *sigh*
yet honestly, every penny these days does count.
God whispers ~it’s not about you~
and He is right.

Here is what our ‘everyday’ table looks like.

And here is that same table to bless our daughter as she turned “10” this week.

It’s sturdy, reliable, faithful to do what it is meant to do;
ha, much like me I think.

It serves well, and that is the purpose, right?

Other lessons:

Regardless of how hard one tries to please everyone in this home,
it is not quite good enough to some people.  
I can allow myself to have hurt feelings,
yet God whispers “it’s not about you”.

I have been working very hard on getting into shape.
Our church offers a Zumba class. 
I am feeling better, but it is to get this weight off.
I’d prefer at times to give up,
although prayer is a very focused time after this class,
and God whispers “it’s not about you”.

The kids have been feeling under the weather
for a chunk of time now.  I am tired.
The 3 yr old specifically, has been extremely challenging.
He has been an endless barrage of screaming fits,
and as I find myself getting frustrated,.
God whispers “it’s not about you”.

I want my house in order,
things in their places,
to be on time,
follow plans,
stay structured and organized,
to feel in control of my own circumstances…
God whispers “it’s not about you”.

and what would I have missed this week,
had I been distracted by my own ‘me’-isms? 

Prayer with a friend
Fellowship with a neighbor
A meaningful walk with a son
Quality moments with our daughter
A heartfelt talk with my dear husband
A sermon by our oldest son in which the message given was about…
True Worshippers.  Where are we allowing our focus to be? 

It’s not about me; it’s about Him.

Not that I have already obtained all this, or have already arrived at my goal, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me.  Philippians 3:12

2 thoughts on “It’s not about me…

  1. WOW! that was really good. . . .and humbling too! thank you for your honesty! it’s awfully easy to have a pity party! I know. . . .I can throw some pretty big ones! Thank you for giving me perspective, even in the little things! It’s all about serving, isn’t it? when we do as God asks, serve; we then will be fulfilled. Awesome post!

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